Vote for the best Michael Jackson joke
Posted by clubwah on June 26, 2009
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Clayton said
THEN:
http://www.forartist.com/forensic/modification/mj/mjscan.jpg
NOW:
http://img2.timeinc.net/ew/dynamic/imgs/060728/113036__thriller_l.jpg
Clayton said
Hey, no-one got any love from the dwarf competition, I expect at least a box set of the Fresh Prince if the MJ ones skyrocket in price suddenly
Clayton said
Jackson’s management have announced the abandonment of what was to be the star’s comeback tour. Dates canceled so far are Rory, 9, and Darcy, 7.
Rebecca said
What’s the difference between McDonalds and MJ?
Nothing – they both put 50 yr old meat between 8 yr old buns….
What’s the difference between Sir Alex Ferguson and Michael Jackson?
Fergie will be playing Giggs in August.
What’s the difference between Michael Jackson and Disney Films?
Disney films can still touch kids
There may still be hope of bringing Michael Jackson back! Apparently they’ve sent one of the Charlie’s Angels in after him.
Doctors say that Michael Jackson will be donating his organs to children… again
Michael Jackson’s last request was to be cremated and for his ashes to be put in an etch-a-sketch so kids could still play with him.
Rumour has it Jacko wants to be buried at sea and strapped to a couple of buoys…
Confirmation just came through that Michael Jackson died of food poisoning apparently he ate some 12 year old nuts.
What did the paramedics say upon arriving to find MJ after the heart attack?
Clear… Wanna be startin’ something…
MJ’s heart attack was actually caused by an allergic reaction after swallowing Bubbles in the bath tub.
Reports that Michael Jackson has had a heart attack are incorrect. He’s been found in the childrens ward having a stroke.
michelle said
Courtesy of The Onion: Neverland Ranch Investigators Discover Corpse of Real Michael Jackson
Ray Dixon said
Feel free to add more jokes in comments, or abuse me for being a thoughtless cunt.
You thoughtless cunt. Where are the Fawcett jokes?
Rebecca said
Got anal cancer?
Going for a shit?
Don’t Fawcett
At the start of her new documentary on her long battle with anal cancer, Farrah Fawcett says “In September 2006 I heard three words I thought I would never hear – malignant, tumour and anal”. Not surprising, considering she’s from Texas. Down there they’re used to words of just one syllable, e.g. go, to, the, mall, buy, junk, food, stuff, face, get, fat, be, loud, piss, off, rest, of, world.
So Farrah Fawcett has died of cancer of the rectum.
Bet she wishes she hadn’t taken part in Charlies Anals.
Farrah Fawcett and Michael Jackson died on the same day, which is something of a coincidence. One played with Majors, the other played with minors.
What’s the difference between Farrah Fawcett and Michael Jackson?
About 3 hours.
It’s Farrah Fawcett I feel sorry for. She’s tries her best to revive her mediocre career by dying of cancer of the arsehole and she still can’t make the headlines.
After hearing that Farrah Fawcett had died of anal cancer, I watch a clip of her from Charlie’s Angels. It was nice to see where she got her crack at the big time.
Ray Dixon said
The only thing she had going for her was that arse. She should’ve stayed married to Lee Majors, he would have got a bionic rectum for her.
Ray Dixon said
This one from “podrick”, posting at PP is about the best I’ve seen:
Intitial autopsy results are out and the blame is being pointed at the boogie. It seems no blame is attached to the sunshine, moonlight or the good times.
Think of the wording in the original song … “Blame it on the boogie.”
Clayton said
I just can’t
I just can’t
I just can’t control my feet
clubwah said
I just can’t
I just can’t
I just control my heart beat
Ray Dixon said
Don’t stop until you getta snuffed
shelly said
Michael Jackson hasn’t been this stiff since Macully Culkin spent the night at Neverland…
Andy R said
Michael Jackson put in his will that once he died, he wanted to be cremated and put into coco pops- just so that he could go through the arse of a 10 year old one more time
Ray Dixon said
Class!
Ray Dixon said
A lot of the people who called me insensitive on Friday, re MJ’s death, have become more jaded and cynical about it all than me.
How could anyone say you’re insensitive to Jacko, Wah, when your latest Tweet proves that you spread it around rather evenly?:
What’s David Carridine, Farah Fawcett & Michael Jackson getting for Christmas? Patrick Swayze…
shelly said
That is vile… and hilarious
Ray Dixon said
I can see I’ll have to get Twitter. That seems to be where all the issues are “discussed” these days.
Hmmm, no I won’t. I refuse.
clubwah said
RAY, ENOUGH ABOUT FUCKING TWITTER ALREADY!!!! I’m hardly going to blog a fucking sentence about Rick Astley. Writing a blog takes time in that I usually to a bit of research to prove my rantings are actually based on something factual, write several hundred words, provide links, sometimes source a pic and then do spell checking albeit really, really badly.
Twitter allows idle thoughts and to say I am blogging more or less since I went on Twitter is stupid. I am either prolific in my writing or I’ll go a few days without inspiration – which is kinda the case at the moment.
Ray Dixon said
Wah, you’re not commenting anywhere except Twitter lately. That’s my point. Nothing else.
clubwah said
Yeah but it’s easy to make a quick comment on Twitter while at work than it is to write a blog.
Ray Dixon said
That’s obvious.
clubwah said
If there was no Twitter there would be no more blogs. Just no Twitter comments.
Ray Dixon said
OK. I’ll sit the craze out.